I’m not worthy…

Lord, I’m not worthy to have you enter under my roof, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed!

Today in Mass, I was struck with the total and complete understanding of just how UNWORTHY I am and just how merciful He is.  I love the Holy Thursday liturgy.  Between the  Scriptures, to the washing of the feet, to the setting of the Eucharistic table, to the distribution of His body and blood to all present as He asked us to do, to the cleansing of the altar after the Eucharistic meal followed by the silent procession with the reserved Holy Eucharist to the chapel.  I always love when the parish decorates the area of the tabernacle holding the reserved Eucharist like a garden.  I can just imagine Jesus asking the disciples to sit with Him for awhile and my heart just longs to stay there with Him and keep watch.  This is just the beginning and what a beginning it is!

As all of the rituals unfolded tonight, I was repeatedly struck by the conviction of my unworthiness for all of this that Christ did for me.  No matter how much I try to follow Him, I have fallen.  Repeatedly.  But, ALWAYS.  ALWAYS, He welcomes us back with open arms.  Have you ever imagined how hard it must have been being divine and KNOWING what was coming and how Judas would betray Him and yet to continue along the path of God’s will and not the will of his human side?  It struck me tonight that as He offered that first Eucharistic celebration at the Last Supper, He KNEW without a shadow of a doubt that the disciples whom he was serving would betray Him, deny Him, and abandon Him within hours.  But, still He washed THEIR feet and gave them the gift of the Eucharist.  Wow!

I thank God that He is such a merciful God!  I would be lost totally without His mercy.

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